So.. it's Sunday morning and the house is quiet (for now).. The kids are still asleep and I am enjoying a cup of coffee and a few minutes of solitude...   I keep thinking back to yesterdays post.. then further back to the past couple of weeks. I have been feeling especially moody for at least that long.  I find myself wanting to be alone most of the time.  The thought of being around anyone but my children makes me anxious. 
I have a good life... beautiful children who love me.. a decent job..good friends; so I can't quite understand why I am feeling this way.  Whatever it is.. I hate it and I am determined to shake it!  But how do you fight something you can't see... something you don't know the origin of?  Vitamins.. herbs.. determination.. or do I give in and opt for technology and man made drugs?  I do not like prescription drugs.. never have.  They tend to mask real issues and more often than not,  the side effects are worse than the condition they are prescribed for.... so I will try determination and some supplements for now.  I should be happily enjoying all of the amazing things that life has provided me... not wanting to hide away from them.  Let's see where this takes me..

Moody today

Enjoying a quiet Saturday after a stressful week.. I have been a bit moody lately; hopefully some quiet time will help.. Clay may stop by for a bit, and Alli's little sister and her friend will be visiting as well.. I am really not in te mood to socialize but I suppose I can manage for a few hours.  

ZeekRewards - The Rewards Program of a Lifetime!

ZeekRewards - The Rewards Program of a Lifetime!

Interesting new prospect that quite a few people are excited about... Figured I would give it a try...
If you happen by.. please do let me know what you think.

Long overdue

So, I have moved to the next phase of my life.. both figuratively and physically!  It feels good.. I moved to a small town just one county away from where I was, and couldn't be happier. The schools are great... neighbors are friendly.. and I am 5 minutes from work.  I am slowly and cautiously meeting new people.. Marissa is flourishing.. she met a new friend and they get along wonderfully.
I have also filed for child support for my littlest angel, Joaquin. It isn't being paid.. but I knew that it wouldn't be.  Within hours of the judges decision,  Jack called me to ask about relinquishing his parental rights.   It was the very thing that kept me from asking for support for so many years... now.. well it is what is.. at least until Joaquin is older and begins to ask questions.  Sigh.. I am not looking forward to that.. but I will handle it as gently as possible... For now.. he is a happy, loved, and well adjusted 4 year old. He asks for his daddy but is content with knowing that daddy is very busy but loves him with all his heart.

It's Sunday morning and my little ones are running around with the dog ... I am  enjoying my coffee and contemplating a few things.  Clay for one.. We have been dating over a year and he still hasn't met the kids.  I suppose thats ok ..but I wonder where we will be in another year.  Will we ever progress past seeing each other once a week...and if so.. is that enough?  Right now I suppose it is..I miss him terribly when I am not with him but it is manageable.  I did mention to him again that we should get together just to introduce him... but he got quiet. He is going through a lot right now so I really don't want to push the issue too much. We have sort of become comfortable with how things are right now...but I think I may want more, someone to come home to at night, to share my life with. I want him to be that person.. but I don't know if that will ever happen. It makes me a little sad to think he will never be ready for that but I am not ready to give up on it just yet. He makes me happy. He has all  the qualities I need in a man... He is strong, thoughtful, caring and we share some of the same values. Could this be love? Could I be lucky enough to find this twice in one life?
A girl can hope:)